MINIs have ruined me

I've been without a car since my R56 blew up. Fortunately I can work from home, but I've been slowly going stir crazy and counting the milliseconds until who-knows-when in December when I will get my F56.

I finally snapped and rented a car. The rental agent seemed to think it was a nice upgrade from a bare-bones car (It's a Camry). It is a decent car, but driving it around I feel like I'm trapped in a soulless, zero-fun hamster wheel of a vehicle.

A couple of times I borrowed the kid's Honda Civic Hybrid (which I previously drove for 10 years) before I got the rental. I felt like a little part of me was dying every time I drove it. The Camry is the same.

I have concluded that the MINI has irredeemably ruined me, and that I am forever cursed to only drive fun, cute cars or suffer a slow lingering death behind the wheel of a boring, gutless normal car.

Anyone else feel ruined by MINIs?